Blog

Where have I been? – a little update

First and foremost, I want to apologise for my lack of posts recently, things haven’t exactly gone exactly to plan…

I was so unwell;

I ended up spending 4 days in hospital. I had Pneumonia (again) and sepsis.

In the run up to the hospital admission I genuinely just thought I had a chest infection. I have had pneumonia before in fact, it was only last October when I had it. That time I spent 5 days in hospital. I did not feel as unwell as I did that time though. Actually though I was more unwell.

I do not remember 2 days of being in the hospital. I don’t know if it was because I was delirious, or if it was the medication. I do remember them saying that my kidneys were shutting down though. The memory of the initial reason as to why I was admitted to the hospital sticks very clearly to me… it all boils down to my eating.

The GP initially sent me to the hospital because he was worried about how my eating disorder leaves me more vulnerable to the negative effects and further deterioration of infections, like a chest infection for example. How very right he was. I remember arguing against his decision because of my previous experiences of being in hospital (mainly mental health reasons) but now I know just how important it was.

I was very very unwell, so much so that I didn’t know the day of the week and barely knew who I was. I was hooked up to oxygen the whole time I was there, intravenously pumped with various fluids and medications. My body was beginning to shut down and I needed medical help to recover.

I hate hospitals mainly because they remind me of the 6 months I spent on a psychiatric ward. I cannot stress though just how incredible the nurses, health care assistants, doctors and even the porters were. Even though the resources are stretched and the staff were doing ridiculously long shifts, they just couldn’t do enough for me. I want each and every healthcare professional to know that they’re truly inspiring and amazing people. They really do go above and beyond.

I also meant some great patients whom I also feel deserve a mention. Just having a chat with them would help to pass the very slow days and we would have a conversation about anything and everything. There was also a patient, in the bed next to me, whom was there for their mental health. Her and I had a few conversations about mental health and when she was discharged she said “thank you for showing so much kindness, chatting to you has helped me feel less alone”. That quite simply, made my heart melt. I hope they get the help that they so desperately deserve.

I am of course not relieved that I got so ill again but, I am glad that it happened out of university term time because I would’ve been forced to take yet another month off!

So yeah, I don’t know if this makes much sense, I’m still recovering and fear I have just rambled a bit. This was just a little update and I promise to be back posting more regularly soon!

Love to you all and thanks for reading.

The Battle in my Brain Author. X X X